Avoiding repetition when there are two unidentified individuals
The tall figure was overwhelmingly tall. It stood in the corner of the
room. The skinny figure right beside him sat on a chair. It wasn't
moving at all. The tall figure moved to the opposite side of the room
and started palpating the wall as if it was looking for something. The
skinny figure then started crawling and palpating the floor as if it
were looking something. The tall figure then started laughing loudly
and clapping his hands as if it were overjoyed. The skinny figure
hearing this started doing the same.
How do I minimize the amount of repetition? Is there a way of doing this without changing drastically the sentences? What would you suggest? As you can see, I used "it" immediately after using the adjective-noun pairs but, when I switch person, I have no choice but to use the appropriate adjective-noun pair.
characters description naming
edited 2 hours ago
Cyn
6,8871740
asked 3 hours ago
repomonsterrepomonster
213
New contributor
repomonster is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
add a comment |
The tall figure was overwhelmingly tall. It stood in the corner of the
room. The skinny figure right beside him sat on a chair. It wasn't
moving at all. The tall figure moved to the opposite side of the room
and started palpating the wall as if it was looking for something. The
skinny figure then started crawling and palpating the floor as if it
were looking something. The tall figure then started laughing loudly
and clapping his hands as if it were overjoyed. The skinny figure
hearing this started doing the same.
How do I minimize the amount of repetition? Is there a way of doing this without changing drastically the sentences? What would you suggest? As you can see, I used "it" immediately after using the adjective-noun pairs but, when I switch person, I have no choice but to use the appropriate adjective-noun pair.
characters description naming
edited 2 hours ago
Cyn
6,8871740
asked 3 hours ago
repomonsterrepomonster
213
New contributor
repomonster is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
Hey repomonster, I'm really glad you liked my answer. I will encourage you though to hold off on choosing a "best answer" for a day or two. This gives other people a chance to answer too, which is of course your goal, to have as many answers as possible. You have enough rep now that you can upvote it, which I hope you will do instead. If you still like my answer best in a couple days, I'd be pleased if you choose it as "best" then. Thanks!
– Cyn
1 hour ago
I was thinking the same, but I thought you may become impatient and so I decided to just give it to you, but I guess I don't have to worry about it, because even if I don't choose it gets eventually chosen by the people in the community.
– repomonster
1 hour ago
It's only been an hour. I know that's forever on the internet but :-) Don't worry, it's okay to take your time choosing. But upvotes are always welcome. And you can upvote all the answers you get if you want. Do go ahead and choose a best answer eventually, for those questions you ask that have one you think is worthy. That will pop you up a couple points too.
– Cyn
1 hour ago
add a comment |
The tall figure was overwhelmingly tall. It stood in the corner of the
room. The skinny figure right beside him sat on a chair. It wasn't
moving at all. The tall figure moved to the opposite side of the room
and started palpating the wall as if it was looking for something. The
skinny figure then started crawling and palpating the floor as if it
were looking something. The tall figure then started laughing loudly
and clapping his hands as if it were overjoyed. The skinny figure
hearing this started doing the same.
How do I minimize the amount of repetition? Is there a way of doing this without changing drastically the sentences? What would you suggest? As you can see, I used "it" immediately after using the adjective-noun pairs but, when I switch person, I have no choice but to use the appropriate adjective-noun pair.
characters description naming
edited 2 hours ago
Cyn
6,8871740
asked 3 hours ago
repomonsterrepomonster
213
New contributor
repomonster is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
The tall figure was overwhelmingly tall. It stood in the corner of the
room. The skinny figure right beside him sat on a chair. It wasn't
moving at all. The tall figure moved to the opposite side of the room
and started palpating the wall as if it was looking for something. The
skinny figure then started crawling and palpating the floor as if it
were looking something. The tall figure then started laughing loudly
and clapping his hands as if it were overjoyed. The skinny figure
hearing this started doing the same.
How do I minimize the amount of repetition? Is there a way of doing this without changing drastically the sentences? What would you suggest? As you can see, I used "it" immediately after using the adjective-noun pairs but, when I switch person, I have no choice but to use the appropriate adjective-noun pair.
characters description naming
characters description naming
edited 2 hours ago
Cyn
6,8871740
asked 3 hours ago
repomonsterrepomonster
213
New contributor
repomonster is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
edited 2 hours ago
Cyn
6,8871740
asked 3 hours ago
repomonsterrepomonster
213
New contributor
repomonster is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
edited 2 hours ago
Cyn
6,8871740
edited 2 hours ago
Cyn
6,8871740
edited 2 hours ago
Cyn
6,8871740
6,8871740
asked 3 hours ago
repomonsterrepomonster
213
New contributor
repomonster is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
asked 3 hours ago
repomonsterrepomonster
213
asked 3 hours ago
repomonsterrepomonster
213
213
New contributor
repomonster is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
New contributor
repomonster is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
repomonster is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
Hey repomonster, I'm really glad you liked my answer. I will encourage you though to hold off on choosing a "best answer" for a day or two. This gives other people a chance to answer too, which is of course your goal, to have as many answers as possible. You have enough rep now that you can upvote it, which I hope you will do instead. If you still like my answer best in a couple days, I'd be pleased if you choose it as "best" then. Thanks!
– Cyn
1 hour ago
I was thinking the same, but I thought you may become impatient and so I decided to just give it to you, but I guess I don't have to worry about it, because even if I don't choose it gets eventually chosen by the people in the community.
– repomonster
1 hour ago
It's only been an hour. I know that's forever on the internet but :-) Don't worry, it's okay to take your time choosing. But upvotes are always welcome. And you can upvote all the answers you get if you want. Do go ahead and choose a best answer eventually, for those questions you ask that have one you think is worthy. That will pop you up a couple points too.
– Cyn
1 hour ago
add a comment |
Hey repomonster, I'm really glad you liked my answer. I will encourage you though to hold off on choosing a "best answer" for a day or two. This gives other people a chance to answer too, which is of course your goal, to have as many answers as possible. You have enough rep now that you can upvote it, which I hope you will do instead. If you still like my answer best in a couple days, I'd be pleased if you choose it as "best" then. Thanks!
– Cyn
1 hour ago
I was thinking the same, but I thought you may become impatient and so I decided to just give it to you, but I guess I don't have to worry about it, because even if I don't choose it gets eventually chosen by the people in the community.
– repomonster
1 hour ago
It's only been an hour. I know that's forever on the internet but :-) Don't worry, it's okay to take your time choosing. But upvotes are always welcome. And you can upvote all the answers you get if you want. Do go ahead and choose a best answer eventually, for those questions you ask that have one you think is worthy. That will pop you up a couple points too.
– Cyn
1 hour ago
Hey repomonster, I'm really glad you liked my answer. I will encourage you though to hold off on choosing a "best answer" for a day or two. This gives other people a chance to answer too, which is of course your goal, to have as many answers as possible. You have enough rep now that you can upvote it, which I hope you will do instead. If you still like my answer best in a couple days, I'd be pleased if you choose it as "best" then. Thanks!
– Cyn
1 hour ago
Hey repomonster, I'm really glad you liked my answer. I will encourage you though to hold off on choosing a "best answer" for a day or two. This gives other people a chance to answer too, which is of course your goal, to have as many answers as possible. You have enough rep now that you can upvote it, which I hope you will do instead. If you still like my answer best in a couple days, I'd be pleased if you choose it as "best" then. Thanks!
– Cyn
1 hour ago
I was thinking the same, but I thought you may become impatient and so I decided to just give it to you, but I guess I don't have to worry about it, because even if I don't choose it gets eventually chosen by the people in the community.
– repomonster
1 hour ago
I was thinking the same, but I thought you may become impatient and so I decided to just give it to you, but I guess I don't have to worry about it, because even if I don't choose it gets eventually chosen by the people in the community.
– repomonster
1 hour ago
It's only been an hour. I know that's forever on the internet but :-) Don't worry, it's okay to take your time choosing. But upvotes are always welcome. And you can upvote all the answers you get if you want. Do go ahead and choose a best answer eventually, for those questions you ask that have one you think is worthy. That will pop you up a couple points too.
– Cyn
1 hour ago
It's only been an hour. I know that's forever on the internet but :-) Don't worry, it's okay to take your time choosing. But upvotes are always welcome. And you can upvote all the answers you get if you want. Do go ahead and choose a best answer eventually, for those questions you ask that have one you think is worthy. That will pop you up a couple points too.
– Cyn
1 hour ago
add a comment |
1 Answer
1
active
oldest
votes
You have a few choices here:
1. You can group each person's actions together more (I've also edited a couple errors).
The tall figure was overwhelmingly tall. It stood in the corner of the
room then moved to the opposite side of the room and started palpating
the wall, as if it was looking for something. Then it started
laughing loudly and clapping its hands as if it were overjoyed.
The skinny figure sat right beside the tall one on a chair. It wasn't
moving at all. It then started crawling and palpating the floor as if
it were looking for something. When the tall figure was laughing and
clapping the skinny figure started doing the same.
2. You can name the characters. If you don't want to use real names, try the characteristics.
Tall was overwhelmingly tall. It stood in the corner of the room.
Skinny right beside it sat on a chair. It wasn't moving at all. Tall
moved to the opposite side of the room and started palpating the wall
as if it was looking for something. Skinny then started crawling and
palpating the floor as if it were looking for something. Tall then
started laughing loudly and clapping its hands as if it were
overjoyed. Skinny hearing this started doing the same.
3. You can make them different genders. Instead of making them both "it" (with some accidental? "he" in there), make one "he" and one "she."
The tall figure was overwhelmingly tall. He stood in the corner of the
room. The skinny figure right beside him sat on a chair. She wasn't
moving at all. He moved to the opposite side of the room and started
palpating the wall as if he was looking for something. She then
started crawling and palpating the floor as if she were looking for
something. He then started laughing loudly and clapping his hands as
if he were overjoyed. Hearing this, she started doing the same.
answered 2 hours ago
CynCyn
6,8871740
I've used all of these techniques, and they feel like good techniques, so I've voted for this answer. But I'd still like more options to handle this situation if feasible. Sigh.
– Ed Grimm
33 mins ago
add a comment |
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1 Answer
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You have a few choices here:
1. You can group each person's actions together more (I've also edited a couple errors).
The tall figure was overwhelmingly tall. It stood in the corner of the
room then moved to the opposite side of the room and started palpating
the wall, as if it was looking for something. Then it started
laughing loudly and clapping its hands as if it were overjoyed.
The skinny figure sat right beside the tall one on a chair. It wasn't
moving at all. It then started crawling and palpating the floor as if
it were looking for something. When the tall figure was laughing and
clapping the skinny figure started doing the same.
2. You can name the characters. If you don't want to use real names, try the characteristics.
Tall was overwhelmingly tall. It stood in the corner of the room.
Skinny right beside it sat on a chair. It wasn't moving at all. Tall
moved to the opposite side of the room and started palpating the wall
as if it was looking for something. Skinny then started crawling and
palpating the floor as if it were looking for something. Tall then
started laughing loudly and clapping its hands as if it were
overjoyed. Skinny hearing this started doing the same.
3. You can make them different genders. Instead of making them both "it" (with some accidental? "he" in there), make one "he" and one "she."
The tall figure was overwhelmingly tall. He stood in the corner of the
room. The skinny figure right beside him sat on a chair. She wasn't
moving at all. He moved to the opposite side of the room and started
palpating the wall as if he was looking for something. She then
started crawling and palpating the floor as if she were looking for
something. He then started laughing loudly and clapping his hands as
if he were overjoyed. Hearing this, she started doing the same.
answered 2 hours ago
CynCyn
6,8871740
I've used all of these techniques, and they feel like good techniques, so I've voted for this answer. But I'd still like more options to handle this situation if feasible. Sigh.
– Ed Grimm
33 mins ago
add a comment |
You have a few choices here:
1. You can group each person's actions together more (I've also edited a couple errors).
The tall figure was overwhelmingly tall. It stood in the corner of the
room then moved to the opposite side of the room and started palpating
the wall, as if it was looking for something. Then it started
laughing loudly and clapping its hands as if it were overjoyed.
The skinny figure sat right beside the tall one on a chair. It wasn't
moving at all. It then started crawling and palpating the floor as if
it were looking for something. When the tall figure was laughing and
clapping the skinny figure started doing the same.
2. You can name the characters. If you don't want to use real names, try the characteristics.
Tall was overwhelmingly tall. It stood in the corner of the room.
Skinny right beside it sat on a chair. It wasn't moving at all. Tall
moved to the opposite side of the room and started palpating the wall
as if it was looking for something. Skinny then started crawling and
palpating the floor as if it were looking for something. Tall then
started laughing loudly and clapping its hands as if it were
overjoyed. Skinny hearing this started doing the same.
3. You can make them different genders. Instead of making them both "it" (with some accidental? "he" in there), make one "he" and one "she."
The tall figure was overwhelmingly tall. He stood in the corner of the
room. The skinny figure right beside him sat on a chair. She wasn't
moving at all. He moved to the opposite side of the room and started
palpating the wall as if he was looking for something. She then
started crawling and palpating the floor as if she were looking for
something. He then started laughing loudly and clapping his hands as
if he were overjoyed. Hearing this, she started doing the same.
answered 2 hours ago
CynCyn
6,8871740
I've used all of these techniques, and they feel like good techniques, so I've voted for this answer. But I'd still like more options to handle this situation if feasible. Sigh.
– Ed Grimm
33 mins ago
add a comment |
You have a few choices here:
1. You can group each person's actions together more (I've also edited a couple errors).
The tall figure was overwhelmingly tall. It stood in the corner of the
room then moved to the opposite side of the room and started palpating
the wall, as if it was looking for something. Then it started
laughing loudly and clapping its hands as if it were overjoyed.
The skinny figure sat right beside the tall one on a chair. It wasn't
moving at all. It then started crawling and palpating the floor as if
it were looking for something. When the tall figure was laughing and
clapping the skinny figure started doing the same.
2. You can name the characters. If you don't want to use real names, try the characteristics.
Tall was overwhelmingly tall. It stood in the corner of the room.
Skinny right beside it sat on a chair. It wasn't moving at all. Tall
moved to the opposite side of the room and started palpating the wall
as if it was looking for something. Skinny then started crawling and
palpating the floor as if it were looking for something. Tall then
started laughing loudly and clapping its hands as if it were
overjoyed. Skinny hearing this started doing the same.
3. You can make them different genders. Instead of making them both "it" (with some accidental? "he" in there), make one "he" and one "she."
The tall figure was overwhelmingly tall. He stood in the corner of the
room. The skinny figure right beside him sat on a chair. She wasn't
moving at all. He moved to the opposite side of the room and started
palpating the wall as if he was looking for something. She then
started crawling and palpating the floor as if she were looking for
something. He then started laughing loudly and clapping his hands as
if he were overjoyed. Hearing this, she started doing the same.
answered 2 hours ago
CynCyn
6,8871740
You have a few choices here:
1. You can group each person's actions together more (I've also edited a couple errors).
The tall figure was overwhelmingly tall. It stood in the corner of the
room then moved to the opposite side of the room and started palpating
the wall, as if it was looking for something. Then it started
laughing loudly and clapping its hands as if it were overjoyed.
The skinny figure sat right beside the tall one on a chair. It wasn't
moving at all. It then started crawling and palpating the floor as if
it were looking for something. When the tall figure was laughing and
clapping the skinny figure started doing the same.
2. You can name the characters. If you don't want to use real names, try the characteristics.
Tall was overwhelmingly tall. It stood in the corner of the room.
Skinny right beside it sat on a chair. It wasn't moving at all. Tall
moved to the opposite side of the room and started palpating the wall
as if it was looking for something. Skinny then started crawling and
palpating the floor as if it were looking for something. Tall then
started laughing loudly and clapping its hands as if it were
overjoyed. Skinny hearing this started doing the same.
3. You can make them different genders. Instead of making them both "it" (with some accidental? "he" in there), make one "he" and one "she."
The tall figure was overwhelmingly tall. He stood in the corner of the
room. The skinny figure right beside him sat on a chair. She wasn't
moving at all. He moved to the opposite side of the room and started
palpating the wall as if he was looking for something. She then
started crawling and palpating the floor as if she were looking for
something. He then started laughing loudly and clapping his hands as
if he were overjoyed. Hearing this, she started doing the same.
answered 2 hours ago
CynCyn
6,8871740
answered 2 hours ago
CynCyn
6,8871740
answered 2 hours ago
CynCyn
6,8871740
answered 2 hours ago
CynCyn
6,8871740
6,8871740
I've used all of these techniques, and they feel like good techniques, so I've voted for this answer. But I'd still like more options to handle this situation if feasible. Sigh.
– Ed Grimm
33 mins ago
add a comment |
I've used all of these techniques, and they feel like good techniques, so I've voted for this answer. But I'd still like more options to handle this situation if feasible. Sigh.
– Ed Grimm
33 mins ago
I've used all of these techniques, and they feel like good techniques, so I've voted for this answer. But I'd still like more options to handle this situation if feasible. Sigh.
– Ed Grimm
33 mins ago
I've used all of these techniques, and they feel like good techniques, so I've voted for this answer. But I'd still like more options to handle this situation if feasible. Sigh.
– Ed Grimm
33 mins ago
add a comment |
repomonster is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
repomonster is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
repomonster is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
repomonster is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
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Hey repomonster, I'm really glad you liked my answer. I will encourage you though to hold off on choosing a "best answer" for a day or two. This gives other people a chance to answer too, which is of course your goal, to have as many answers as possible. You have enough rep now that you can upvote it, which I hope you will do instead. If you still like my answer best in a couple days, I'd be pleased if you choose it as "best" then. Thanks!
– Cyn
1 hour ago
I was thinking the same, but I thought you may become impatient and so I decided to just give it to you, but I guess I don't have to worry about it, because even if I don't choose it gets eventually chosen by the people in the community.
– repomonster
1 hour ago
It's only been an hour. I know that's forever on the internet but :-) Don't worry, it's okay to take your time choosing. But upvotes are always welcome. And you can upvote all the answers you get if you want. Do go ahead and choose a best answer eventually, for those questions you ask that have one you think is worthy. That will pop you up a couple points too.
– Cyn
1 hour ago